almost honest

Why do i get a feeling that everyone is oggling at me?
It's a syndrome that i am a victim of ...i have always wanted to camouflage in the crowd...
There is this fear that i associate with being singled out, being visible...
I dread at the possibilities of emerging from the walls where i live.

At a certain place, everything is going about almost fine and then enter I, centre stage...
I am no ethereal beauty that could floor any man...human, but i am very strange.
I got eyes that are bigger than they should be...and my hair produces oil all by itself, no matter how rough a shampoo i use.
And fate always has it that i turn up wearing THE wrong dress...something that no one else is wearing at the place i am in...

People's stares make my mind cough up words like 'eh? what's wrong with me?'

Fortunately if i let five minutes of time pass...i can again get back to being myself. People stop noticing me... and i begin noticing them...

I LOVE observing things around myself...i would love to wait for a friend at CCD or any public place for that matter...sitting alone on a table gives me the liscence to observe, mull, and then finally choose words that would fit in to describe what i think about those people...Forget it...i confess...i flat stare at people!

Hmmm...I am single though, i like watching couples...! i have had a few posts about my adventures of gazing at drowned-in-the-nectar-of-love twosomes...i try to figure out the chemistry that binds them together. Love is an all time beautiful thing to me. And the naive victims of my gaze are so much busy in fathoming each other...that they don't get the slightest idea that their emotion is literally quenching my aesthetic hunger..whateverthatmeans!

And about the quotes on T-shirts of guys...Oh! they are the things i am the second most obsessed with...( my first obsession is me!) I go nuts about reading those quotes and later laughing to myself...i do what not , i die to look at the T-shirt till i am able to read it completely...and comprehend it and laugh at it. And the poor guy thinks it was him i was staring it...:)

Well here is another confession...i also spare my stares for those marvellous masterpieces i have blogged about earlier. I indulge myself...never deny myself anything that 'I' ask for...I passionately admire anything i love... But at the end of the day...I am the apple of my I.

29 comments:

annie said...

That was such a cute post...totally diffrnt n refreshing:)

annie said...

I love checking out what i know cant be mine..lol

anirudh said...

loe da last line...
so many i's used in thid post..! but i m sure u must be..aah forget it..wont say in public..!
every ill be staring at u den...!

vitruvian said...

aahhhh...
NARCISSISM.....
tis such a sweet thing....
i truly think its one of the best possible things a person can be...

it was really refreshing to read something written my u!!

cheers!

vitruvian said...

*by

Abhishek Khanna said...

hehe.. Poor guys who were thinking tht u were stating at them .. lolz

Amrita Sabat said...

waaaaaaaaaaah..........amazing..........yes we NARCISSISTS love readin our own posts a lot!!!!!!!! coz it is US in der.........our blog is a part of us- eternal on dis cyber space. Even if we physically might not b.:)

well dat's sumthin common b/n u & me as well- we can feel ppl's stares digging in2 us....:P........i guess all Women wd hv felt dat sumtym or d oder.....i can guarantee dat!! & no...it does nt depend on ur physical beauty or ugliness.....it's jst a ritual....to feast eyes on ppl by ppl....:).......quite natural........

ya t-shirt slogans- even i m attracted to dem........but i sumhow can't get myself 2 complete dem at d cost of dem thinking- hey dis lady loves me!!:P
ha ha!!

wildflower said...

@ annie
thank you so much...and hmmm yea...goin by what u hv said...there are plenty of things i can't have..so plenty of things i am yet to write about!

@ anirudh
what is it?? cmon yaar..!

@ vitruvian
I am a self proclaimed narcissist...others dont deserve my lowweee....haha
and m so glad that dis refreshed ya :) :)

@ abhishek
LoL

@ amrita
amrita..amrita..amrita
u n i are yet to discover how many more things we have in common...:)

Pri said...

heehee u sure do sound like me...
I am the apple of my I too ;p

loved reading this./..

relations said...

lucky ones are rare..
at whom you stare..

Keshi said...

cute!

Keshi.

pushkala said...

refreshng!!

nowwhoisit said...

lol...from now on iam gonna b wearin t-shirts with quotes....atleast sum ppl will stare at me atleast until they c the face....lol....newaz...really nice post...luved it.....keep writin.....

anirudh said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
divya said...

lol y do i feel that u looking at the tshirt quote is just an alibi for looking at the guys :D lol just kidding

had so much fun reading it :D

wildflower said...

@ pri..
same pinch then :)

@ relations
y shud they be lucky?

@ keshi & pushkala
thanx dears..!

@ nowwhoisit
well..put my ideas into practice...that gives me a sense of accomplishment!

@ divya
Well Well...see you know it all...!!!sigh!

Shraddha said...

u know reading ths post was like readng about myself!so much of wht u hv written is how i feel and think too!!really nice :-)

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

i understand that we dont want to be center staged all the time but once in while, it is a god feeling, at least for me it is.

I, for one, liking buying shirts with witty captions :)

I love your choice of words: drowned-in-the-nectar-of-love twosomes. :)

annie said...

cool...waiting to hear more.

moimystique said...

hehehe awesomely written!!

wildflower said...

@ raaji..
but strange eyes feasting on u...is just beyond our comfort levels..isnt that so?

@ annie
:) :)

@ shraddha
'like' people exist dear

@ moimystique
thanks :D

Envy said...

Quite a HAndful habit ...... you learn a lot about life and its essence like that.....

Just don't stare guys for long.... :P :P

................your's entirely said...

big eyes,glistening hair n the feeling of being oddly dressed...wow we have a beauty pageant winner here...just kiddin' don't flare up pleaaassssseee.loved the honest confessions u have voiced here :)
though i think captions on tees are real UNCOOL...it's a means of attracting attention for people who are unattractive

wildflower said...

@ envy
it's not the guys dear
it's some misterpieces! LoL!

@ your's entirely
honestly, it's nice to see u visit..another honest confession straight from heart :)

................your's entirely said...

@ wildflower
oh thank you.the pleasure's all mine....drop by on my blog

relations said...

just tried to make rhyme.. cudnt match urs though..

claytonia vices said...

"Marvelous masterpieces"...

I need to go into the archives and find out what they are!

none of your said...

the way you read quotes on T-shirts of guys and laugh,
i read different blogs of the self-proclaimed writers and have a great laugh!:)
ha ha ha, this blog is damn funny

by the way i am A self-proclaimed genius

wildflower said...

@ none
wots wrong in being a writer, -self proclaimed or not!
& abt yu being a self proclaimed genius..thts totally ur problm but u might need external HELP!