almost honest

Why do i get a feeling that everyone is oggling at me?
It's a syndrome that i am a victim of ...i have always wanted to camouflage in the crowd...
There is this fear that i associate with being singled out, being visible...
I dread at the possibilities of emerging from the walls where i live.

At a certain place, everything is going about almost fine and then enter I, centre stage...
I am no ethereal beauty that could floor any man...human, but i am very strange.
I got eyes that are bigger than they should be...and my hair produces oil all by itself, no matter how rough a shampoo i use.
And fate always has it that i turn up wearing THE wrong dress...something that no one else is wearing at the place i am in...

People's stares make my mind cough up words like 'eh? what's wrong with me?'

Fortunately if i let five minutes of time pass...i can again get back to being myself. People stop noticing me... and i begin noticing them...

I LOVE observing things around myself...i would love to wait for a friend at CCD or any public place for that matter...sitting alone on a table gives me the liscence to observe, mull, and then finally choose words that would fit in to describe what i think about those people...Forget it...i confess...i flat stare at people!

Hmmm...I am single though, i like watching couples...! i have had a few posts about my adventures of gazing at drowned-in-the-nectar-of-love twosomes...i try to figure out the chemistry that binds them together. Love is an all time beautiful thing to me. And the naive victims of my gaze are so much busy in fathoming each other...that they don't get the slightest idea that their emotion is literally quenching my aesthetic hunger..whateverthatmeans!

And about the quotes on T-shirts of guys...Oh! they are the things i am the second most obsessed with...( my first obsession is me!) I go nuts about reading those quotes and later laughing to myself...i do what not , i die to look at the T-shirt till i am able to read it completely...and comprehend it and laugh at it. And the poor guy thinks it was him i was staring it...:)

Well here is another confession...i also spare my stares for those marvellous masterpieces i have blogged about earlier. I indulge myself...never deny myself anything that 'I' ask for...I passionately admire anything i love... But at the end of the day...I am the apple of my I.