Redemption

One moment, pockets full of sand. Washed ashore by waves, still afloat. Water receding from between toes. My glistening anklet of silver. A melange of the shades of sunset, burst of orange, invisible streaks of purple. Palms dug an inch in the wet sand, sinking deeper with every new tide. Wondering what to write. A couple of precious words, that eyes could see erased. In the next moment.

Another moment, struggling for dear life, holding on to a thread to be alive. Mid sea. Looking for a hand, that could pull me up. On to my toppled boat. An untiring effort, of the lungs to breath, of the heart to beat, of my eyes to cry. And appreciate, that thin line of a difference between being alive and being not so.

The next moment, sinking. Swallowed an unbearable expanse of blue. Into a white infinity. Falling meters in seconds. Into a depth where life jackets wouldn't work anymore. Flapping hands and legs. Fear giving up its hold on my mind, numbness fast taking over. Not looking for that hand anymore. To come save me. Letting go.

In that final moment, hanging from a parachute. Sailing across from top. Having conquered, seas, skies. And myself. Like another bird. Feet off in the air, hands clutching tight no more. Hearing my own screams stop. In a kind of a redemptive pause. Between absolute faith and a destiny-less randomness.

And a quiet decision to let me be. Just be.